I had the joy of attending my daughter-in-law’s baby shower this weekend. A group of her twenty-something year old friends and I celebrated the upcoming arrival of little Macallan Jon, due next month. This was a great setting for people-watching, one of my favorite activities.
My daughter-in-law and the other young women were lovely, each uniquely so. As they interacted I sensed the warmth of long-standing friendships. Also present were ever-so-subtle cues of insecurity. I recognized them right away, because of my close association with insecurity over the years.
Comments demeaning their own physical appearance.
Nervous expressions of self-doubt for not being a good friend.
An overly inflated air of confidence.
I smiled to myself as I remembered all the times I beat myself up for not being good enough in social settings, and I thanked God for walking with me to a place of acceptance. As an older woman with grandkids, I don’t compare myself with others like I used to. (Please know, I still struggle at times, but I’m not brutal to myself like I was as a younger woman.) I’m not trying to confirm my value, because I experience Christ’s deep love for me. Not in a general way — “for God so loved the world” — but in a very specific, personalized way. I know that I know that I know that I am loved and worthwhile. This knowledge helps me to lead and serve others well.
If I could give a gift to a younger generation of women, it would be an awareness on a soul-level of their immeasurable worth, based not on performance but on the grace and devotion of the Lord. I would impart to them some life-giving principles.
- Your value is not determined by your physical appearance or the size of clothing you wear.
- Your value is not based on how well you perform at work or how well you manage your household.
- The harsh words of your spouse, parent, or friend do not diminish your value in any way.
- You don’t have to prove your worth.
- You are precious and priceless, loved dearly and fiercely by the Lord. Period.
- Just be.
My youngest daughter recently self-published her first book entitled Be. The book is a romance. It is neither realistic or practical, and she didn’t intend it as that. I really like some of the lines spoken by Jasper, the main male character. Jasper’s words convey the value and worth of his beloved, Scarlette.
“You are who you are. And that is utterly stunning.”
“Please know this. Darling, you are desperately beautiful. Your shattered heart bleeds beauty. Your soul cries beauty. Your mind radiates beauty. Everything you are explodes beauty.”
“Just be, my darling. Because you are seen. You are enough.”
When I read these words, I imagine that Jasper is symbolic of my Jesus. Can you imagine that with me? You are the beloved of the Lord. You are desperately beautiful to Him. He sees you. You can cease your striving. Through Him, you are enough. Just be.
I cried out, “I am slipping!” but your unfailing love, O Lord, supported me. When doubts filled my mind, your comfort gave me renewed hope and cheer (Psalm 94:18-19 NLT).
See what great love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God! And that is what we are! (1 John 3:1).
Follow God’s example, therefore, as dearly loved children and walk in the way of love, just as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us as a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God (Ephesians 5:1-2 NIV).
Heavenly Father, thank You for Your love and acceptance. Open my eyes to see the ways that I try to prove my worth. Let me rest in the knowledge that I am Your beloved and nothing I do will make it more true. In Jesus’ Name. Amen.
Be by Jordanne M. Babcock is available on amazon.com.