Posted in Faith, Personal Development

Turning 50!

IMG_3952

The year 1967 is a very special year to me. It is the year of my birth, and last weekend I celebrated my 50th birthday. I always enjoy my birthday, because it is a chance to reflect on my life and see God’s faithfulness interwoven throughout my days.

This year was especially meaningful. My husband organized a party at a local pizza place, and we invited our family and friends to join us. We were blessed with more people than we anticipated, along with some surprise arrivals. It was thrilling to be surrounded by such a loving and supportive group. Some people have known me for many years, other people are more recent friends, but each one has a special place in my heart.

I soaked in the sweet camaraderie of the evening, and pondered the gift of life. The fabulous evening punctuated my resolve: I don’t want to waste this precious gift on meaningless pursuits or to secure my own comfort. Instead, I desire to focus my attention on a few things that really matter.

Jesus. My Savior and Lord is absolutely everything to me. I dedicated my life to Him at the age of 13 (which was a long time ago). It is easy to settle into a spiritual comfort zone, but I don’t want that. I want to love and serve and know Him with all that I am. I want to passionately follow Jesus Christ in joyful obedience, and live as a bright light for Him. I want to be in the habit of saying “yes” to Him, and step out in faith to do whatever He asks of me.

Relationships. I dearly love my family and friends. I am also wired to be task oriented and goal oriented. I like structure and organization. I like to check off my to-do list, preferably in order. Tasks and achievements bring peace to my mind. Unfortunately they can interfere with relationships. However, connecting with loved ones nourishes my soul. I want to engage in the sacred, messy work of building and restoring my relationships.

Growth. The older I get, the less I know. I won’t presume that I have ever arrived. Rather, I submit to the process of life-long learning. I want to become more like Jesus, allowing the Holy Spirit to transform me into His likeness. I want to continue to heal from the effects of childhood and more recent traumas. I want to develop the skills of being a better servant leader in myself and others.

Service. I don’t want to be guilty of being enraged by all the injustices in the world and not doing something about it. I can’t sit on the sidelines while people are hurting. I must invest in improving the lives of those who are disadvantaged or marginalized, the “least of these” who are so important to Jesus.

I just had the privilege of celebrating 50 years of life. Tomorrow is not guaranteed. But I can live each day I am given with intention.

Jesus replied, “The most important commandment is this: ‘Listen, O Israel! The Lord our God is the one and only Lord. And you must love the Lord your God with all your heart, all your soul, all your mind, and all your strength.’ The second is equally important: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ No other commandment is greater than these.” (Mark 12:29-31)

Since you have heard about Jesus and have learned the truth that comes from him, throw off your old sinful nature and your former way of life, which is corrupted by lust and deception. Instead, let the Spirit renew your thoughts and attitudes. Put on your new nature, created to be like God—truly righteous and holy (Ephesians 4:21-24).

Prayer:

Heavenly Father, thank You for the gift of life. May I not take it for granted. Help me to identify what really matters, and then live with intention. I know I cannot do this by my own strength and abilities. May I thrive through Your Spirit, as You empower me to make each day count. In Jesus’ Name. Amen.

 

Advertisements
Posted in Faith, Personal Development

About Pie Crusts and Personal Growth

IMG_3869

My husband and I have a business called “Love My Pies.” As the name suggests, we sell artisan pies made to order. It may surprise you to know that my husband is the baker.

Jonathan’s grandmother and mom were gifted in the kitchen. They shared their love for cooking with him, showing him the secrets of making homemade biscuits and gravy, cornbread, cinnamon rolls, and pie crust. I, on the other hand, did not develop such a gift. I was the main cook while raising our kids, and I enjoyed making cookies of all kinds. But I avoided any dish that required lots of time and attention, especially pie crusts. I asked Jonathan to teach me a couple times, only to be reduced to tears by my own impatience and frustration. He made it look so easy, and I struggled to roll the dough into something that even resembled a circle.

A few years in our marriage I decided I would leave the pie crusts to my husband. Why should I keep trying when he could do it so much better?

I think it is a good strategy to focus where we are gifted. We thrive when we work with our strengths and abilities, and allow other people to work with theirs. However, it is also important to have a growth mindset, to be open to discovery and innovation. I had a bad case of a fixed mindset, the opposite of a growth mindset. I had decided that I would never be good at making pie crust.

A fixed mindset leads to personal stagnation and an inability to recover from mistakes. It believes that success happens naturally through talent rather than effort. It gives up when frustrated. It avoids being challenged, because failure is final.

A growth mindset leads to personal growth and resilience. It looks forward to challenges and will persevere when facing difficulties. It believes that learning may not come easily, but that’s okay. Anything can be learned eventually with desire and a positive attitude.

Here is a picture of the first pie crust that I made all by myself this weekend. It is a huge accomplishment for me, because after all these years, I determined to have a growth mindset. Recently we have had several requests for gluten free pies. My husband is busy baking for our pie orders, so I am the one with the time to experiment. My first pie crust was made with gluten free flour. It was far from perfect and the recipe needs to be adjusted, but I did it! I am excited to continue learning.

Having a growth mindset is one of my goals as I get older. I want to keep growing in faith and as a person, and to keep learning new things. I don’t want to become stagnate and shrivel. I believe that the Lord, with His eternal nature, is creative and vibrant. He imparts His life to us in the midst of the aging process. It’s nice to know that it’s never too late to practice a growth mindset. We can start with something as simple as a pie crust.

When I was a child, I spoke and thought and reasoned as a child. But when I grew up, I put away childish things (1 Corinthians 13:11).

Instead, we will speak the truth in love, growing in every way more and more like Christ, who is the head of his body, the church (Ephesians 4:15).

Prayer:
Heavenly Father, You are the God of life and transformation. Challenge me to have a growth mindset rather than a fixed mindset. Help me to keep growing as a person and in my relationship with You, to become all that You intend me to be. In Jesus’ Name. Amen.

Posted in Faith, Personal Development

You Are So Much More Than Labels

papers in air

Have you noticed all the quizzes on Facebook these days? Take a short test and learn which Disney character you most resemble, or who your literary soulmate is, or what era of history you belong in. We human beings are fascinated with ourselves and how we fit in the world. If we really want to figure ourselves out, there are many professional assessments from which to choose. We can build quite a profile:

~Are you an introvert or extrovert? (Did you know there is even an ambivert?)
~Which one of the four personalities are you in the DISC personality assessment?
~Which one of the 16 personalities are you in the Myers-Briggs personality assessment?
~What are your top five leadership strengths?
~What are your spiritual gifts?
~What is your preferred learning style?
~Which of the nine intelligences do you possess?
~What is your IQ?

And this is just part of a long list.

I’m not minimizing the value of learning about ourselves. It is enlightening and even fun to understand how God made us. It helps us to become more aware and better leaders. However, who we are goes way beyond labels.

The personal assessment mentioned above usually identify positive or neutral characteristics. Sometimes we receive labels from others in our lives.

Outgoing. Shy. Smart. Slow learner. Stupid. Beautiful. Full figured. Fat. Ugly. Athletic. Clumsy. Driven. Lazy. Worthless. Failure…

People can inflict great damage from their use of labels.

Regardless of the labels you have received, you are so much more than labels.

Labels may describe aspects of ourselves. But they are limited. They may or may not be true. They cannot describe everything about us. And they certainly do not define us.

A couple weeks ago at a counseling session, I took an assessment regarding a trauma that occurred earlier this year. As I result I was diagnosed with PTSD. I felt shaken and frustrated that the event continues to affect me, and I reached out to a friend who shared words of wisdom.

“I hear what you are saying, that the diagnosis of PTSD is disappointing. Know it is only a path to healing, not an identity.”

Thank God for this friend and her reminder! This label does not define me. The work of God is working in me.

Being an introvert does not keep me from loving people. Preferring to work alone does not prevent me from working with a team. Being detail-oriented does not mean I cannot develop visionary skills. The diagnosis of PTSD will not cripple me from doing the things the Lord has asked of me. It is a pathway to experience more of Him in my life.

What about you? Do you realize that God is at work in you?

The One who knows your thoughts before you are even aware and has counted every hair on your head is working to transform you into the image of Christ.

The Lover of your soul is teaching you to love. He is working in the midst of your closest relationships.

The Healer is strengthening you by His mighty power. He sees your current diagnosis or health challenge and is closer than you know.

The King of all kings has set you in your current place of leadership. Even when the task seems too large for your experience and abilities, He is equipping you with everything you need to do His will.

Don’t put too much authority on the labels in your life. Use them as tools and discard the ones that are damaging. You are so much more than labels. You are a cherished child of our Heavenly Father who has a special plan for your life and is working in you to fulfill it.

May you experience the love of Christ, though it is too great to understand fully. Then you will be made complete with all the fullness of life and power that comes from God. Now all glory to God, who is able, through his mighty power at work within us, to accomplish infinitely more than we might ask or think (Ephesians 3:19-20, NLT).

Prayer:

Heavenly Father, thank You for Your perfect love. Help me to remember that the labels in life do not define me. I am who You say I am, and You are working in me to become more than I could ask or imagine. In Jesus’ Name. Amen.

Posted in Character, Personal Development

Be Patient With Yourself

BePatient

Who are you more patient with—others or yourself? If you’re anything like me, I am harder on myself than on anyone else. I am a perfectionist. However, I can be flexible with other people, and brutal with myself.

Jesus has done so much in my life, and I desire to please Him. I want to reflect Him in every way. But sometimes I don’t change fast enough. I get impatient with my lack of progress and the times when I face a set back. Sometimes I can be my own worst enemy.

I need to remember that transformation is a process, a consistent renewal over time. It’s not about arriving. It’s about becoming.

It would be crazy to expect a newborn baby to immediately start walking. We understand that it takes time to learn to roll over, scoot, crawl, walk, and then run.

The process from child to adult takes at least 18 years. Brain development experts say the brain isn’t fully developed until age 25-30!

It takes 10,000 hours of practicing a skill—the right kind of practice—before a person reaches an expert level.

So, why do I forget when it comes to my own personal and spiritual growth? Maturity is a continual process. Servant leadership requires on-going diligence to cultivate. There may be a growth spurt. Sometimes it will be three steps forward, two steps back. But over time I’m making progress.

What about you? Do you relate? Are there areas in which you need to renew your trust in the step-by-step work of God in your life? You may not be where you would like, but look at how far you’ve come.

“And I am sure that God who began the good work within you will keep right on helping you grow in his grace until his task within you is finally finished on that day when Jesus Christ returns” (Philippians 1:6, TLB).

We have God’s promise that He is always at work in us. Sometimes visible. Sometimes unseen. His work of grace continues to mold and shape us throughout our life time or until the return of Jesus Christ.

We thrive in life and in God’s calling as leaders when we stop beating ourselves up. Moment by moment, walk in His grace. Be patient with yourself. God isn’t finished yet.

May God give you more and more grace and peace as you grow in your knowledge of God and Jesus our Lord (2 Peter 1:2, NLT).

Prayer
Heavenly Father, thank You that You see me as I am, imperfections and all. Thank You for not leaving me where You found me. You continue to work in me, transforming me into the image of Jesus Christ. Forgive me for my impatience and for the times I condemn myself. Help me to respond to Your conviction, to receive Your grace, and to allow the Holy Spirit to work in me. In Jesus’ name. Amen.